Thursday, March 12, 2009

But the Greatest of These is Love: Within Marriage

So I might have these random thoughts come up out of nowhere about "love", because I am just trying so hard to mediate on this concept right now. Yesterday, I had another revelation. And before I tell you what it is, I want you to know that I only write these things to try to encourage you as well. I definitely don't have it all figured out, and most of the time my thoughts won't make any sense, but I want to write them so I can look back at them. 

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

"Love"... Biblical "love", in relation to marriage:

Things people say...

"I still love them, but I want a divorce"... not love. 

"Yes, I hit her, but I love her..." ... not love.

Or what about when we are fighting with our friends, boy/girl friends, fiance's, spouses', and we say things like, "Remember 2 months ago when you did this?!"... not love (keeping a record of wrongs). 

Or what about the times that you constantly are reminding someone of ALL that you've done for them, and how horrible they are being to you... rude, proud, easily angered... not love. 

Over the past few months I have asked God - "God! Show me why it is even important to be married! How can having to deal with someone else, which takes time away from "serving in ministry", be more beneficial than being single?!" 

Again, I always knew the answer... but I didn't really KNOW the answer! But now I get it! I get it!

God tells us that a husband is to love his wife like Christ loves the church. So a husband and wife are to love each other like God loves them. So a marriage relationship is a testimony to others about how much God loves them (the "others"). Non-Christians should be able to look to Christian marriages and see how much God loves them because of the couple's love for one another. 

But instead we (Christians... the Church) have a rampant divorce rate that is the same percentage as the rest of the world. Men and women cheat on their spouses with the mindset that they "will be forgiven"... by God at least. And even worse, there are people who are in marriage relationships who are just ridiculous towards their spouses. Maybe they are verbally or physically abusive, or just plain un-loving. This just shouldn't be. 

Anyway, maybe all you married people out there learn this in marriage counseling (hopefully), but I am just happy I am learning this before I am in a serious relationship. I think this is a start to a very healthy relationship for me... and to restoring those relationships that haven't been very healthy (at least within my own heart...). 


Simone Knepper said...

learnt it from my mom... and from Jono ... who is AMAZING!

Carrie said...

awwww. jono.